I’ve been a little lost this last week. I don’t really know what I’m doing or where I’m going next….I kind of do, but not really. I have plane tickets but I’m not sure if I should. I don’t have a plan, or what I consider a plan. I always have people telling me how courageous and confident I am, and how awesome my life must be, but I don’t really feel like that right now. I feel useless, drifting aimlessly and not all that cool to be honest. I’m being pretty hard on myself. I need to get my chin up, and if you do too, keep reading.
Sometimes you just gotta roll with the punches.
Sometimes things don’t always work out the way you want them to.
Sometimes life isn’t easy.
BUT.
When you have nothing left, you still have you. And you need to make sure you know that no matter what, you fuckin rule. I tell myself this every single day. And I get into adventures and misadventures all the time with no one to rely on except me, so I have to remind myself of this constantly.
I had someone close to me in Roatan tell me that I wasn’t fun to be around any more because I was always wound-up, negative and complaining about everything. Guess what? Having someone tell you that to your face sucks. Like a lot. Know what’s worse? That was the third time in my life that someone had the balls to tell me that to my face. I had to own up to the fact that three separate people couldn’t be wrong….the common denominator was ME. That was hard.
I feel like a lot of this negativity came from beating myself up about things that were out of my control (mostly other people). This is a waste of time and brain space. If it’s not up to you, forget about it and go eat cupcakes. That’s what I do. You can probably come up with something more creative and better for your waistline. But once I started letting the little things slide, and being more confident in myself, things came together. This doesn’t just apply to people like me who flail around the world on a whim… this message is for everyone.
I’m awesome. So are you. If you can’t remember this, print this out and put it above your bed:
AND THEN DO IT.
Also, if you still have trouble remembering, just watch my favorite video ever. One time and it will be stuck in your head forever….sorry. Thank you to the (hopefully last) person who was brave enough to tell me I was being a downer, and for introducing me to this hilarious song. You know who you are. Love ya bro, for real.
Jamie T says
Your blog reminds me of the early letters of Hunter S. Thompson from the book The Proud Highway. It is my favorite even though it is technically a bunch of letters and not really a book, but your blog reminds me of it, and it is a good good thing. Keep living adventurously!
CubicleThrowdown says
Wow, Jamie, thank you so much for what I think is the hugest compliment I've ever received!! Glad you are enjoying it.
VacayGirl says
You know we all have our moments when we are not "on" all the time. And it's ok as long as you can manage to bounce your way out of it. And sometimes no one can get you out of your funk but you. I do the same thing. Times do get troubling or worrisome and you sometimes have to sport a frown until you figure it out. You'll figure it out and you will be fine. You didn't make it this far to be left hanging. And no matter what just no you can always go "home". You may not want to but it's always there.
CubicleThrowdown says
Exactly! I definitely was not on last week. And sometimes when I read blogs that are all "oooooooooh la la my life is amazing every single second" all I can think is yeah right 🙂 That video always manages to put a smile on my face though!